Hey there, welcome to vpsBoard.
Luckily for you, cPanel makes managing a server quite easy. Even when you encounter issues or have a question, the software is in use by so many that if the official cPanel documentation fails to cover it, then you can rest assured that the question has been asked (and answered) either on their community forum or elsewhere.
Installing cPanel is easy, it's just a few command lines you can copy/paste, the install is more or less automated and will take 30-60 minutes depending on the server. You'll have a few setup questions once you login to WHM for the first time, but more than likely the defaults will be fine for you. I'd still advise you read every prompt and just be aware of what you're clicking on.
Root password can be changed via WHM or from the command line itself by simply using the 'passwd' command when logged in as root. Pretty simple.
I'd recommend CSF for the firewall. It's also heavily used, heavily documented. Installation is also a breeze:
http://configserver.com/free/csf/install.txt I also like CSF because you can run the tool to check your server hardening and can toggle on detailed explanations and follow the instructions.
Unsure about DigitalOcean's setup, though I know it's KVM based. Setting the swappiness is also quite easy. IBM has good documentation here:
http://pic.dhe.ibm.com/infocenter/lnxinfo/v3r0m0/index.jsp?topic=%2Fliaat%2Fliaattunsetswapiness.htm Should be noted you probably wouldn't have to worry about this and if you're using swap often you'll likely find that upgrading the actual RAM (or reducing usage) to be more beneficial to you.
Optimizing MySQL isn't as difficult as you may think. They make some pretty nifty tools to assist with this and guide you, the most popular of which would be MySQLtuner.pl (
https://raw.githubusercontent.com/major/MySQLTuner-perl/master/mysqltuner.pl) There may also be some cPanel specific guides that exist too.
If you're in North America, cPanel will mail you FREE reference posters, which may or may not be handy to you. I've some hanging on the wall but I find Googling easier than squinting my bad eyes at a glossy poster.